Class Action...

    Chuck Palahniuk noted, “If you tell folks you're a college student, folks are so impressed. You can be a student in anything and not have to know anything. Just say toxicology or marine biokinesis, and the person you're talking to will change the subject to himself. If this doesn't work, mention the neural synapses of embryonic pigeons.” What this quote describes is the fact there is a lot of jargon associated with being a college student. This jargon, however helpful it may be in conversation, is learned through long hours in a classroom. This blog will be about classroom culture and will discuss some of the observations I have either noticed people do or have personally done in class. Some of these observations are positive ways to stay attention, while other observations are focused on how students pass the time in less constructive ways. Either way, all of these observations are important aspects of collegiate culture and life.

Observation 1, Body positioning: how one sits in class determines an incredible amount about how a student survives classes. Though there are many ways one can sit, I will simplify them into three major positions.

• Comfortable: Despite this innocuous looking title, this position can make any tired individual asleep in about ten minutes. This position usually involves slumping ones body down into the chair, with folded arms, and eyes that continually fight the brows. While this position is okay if you are fully alert or unconcerned about the class, it can hurt any individual who is tired. It also must be noted that there is a variation of this position where one puts the arms on the desk and rests the head on the hands. This position is also induces high levels of sleep.
• The Angle: This position allows for a student to daydream. Though not quite as dangerous as the “Comfortable position,” it often invokes outside thoughts and lets students slip into blissful daydreams. Positioning one’s body directly over one butt-cheek or the other, while the student’s congruent arm props up the chin is how this position is created. This is probably the most common body position for students because it is somewhat comfortable, while allowing students to generally pay attention. This position is also incredibly helpful if one wants to inconspicuously text.
• Posture: This involves sitting up straight. That’s it. But the interesting aspect about this position is that few people can sit this way for a long time period. Why? Because it’s uncomfortable! The amazing part of this position is that most students start in this position and then sloooooowwwwwllly slip into either of the other two positions.

Observation 2, Eyes and Attention: It is amazing how much is told by someone’s eyes. While this observation has many applications, the most pertinent one to this blog is the student’s eye contact (or lack thereof) with the professor. Student’s who are intently listening and soaking in the information generally keep constant eye contact with the professor, the notes, or the class texts. This ensures that the focus is structured around what is happening in the class and not what the student is doing after the class.

Observation 3, Distractions: There are many forms of distractions for students. Some of these distractions are necessary for students to stay awake in class others are just rude. The most prevalent distractions are doodles, games, laptops, and cell phones. Each will be discussed separately:

• Doodles: Probably the oldest form of self-entertainment, these little wonders are prevalent across all levels of education, but actually allow students to give some attention, while doing something more interesting.
• Games: Also quite prevalent, this technique of class boredom spans anywhere from tic-tac-toe to staring contests. The important aspect of this form of distraction is really the other person. Your goal is to get the other person to get in trouble for not paying attention, while you are innocently staring at the professor trying to determine where you are in the notes.
• Cell Phones: Cell phones are a recent plague for professors that encapsulate doodles, games, and texting. They are especially dangerous for students because of the telltale shiny screen reflections and intent concentration on whatever is happening in the digital world. At the same time they are easily concealable and prevalent across ALL college campuses.
• Laptops: Part of this blog was written on a laptop in class, actually. That is because some professors actually feel laptops enable students to take better notes. To that I say “Ha!” As any college student knows, the biggest reason to have a laptop on during class is to browse the Internet and do homework for other classes.

    Well this concludes my observations about how students act in class. While these observations are not strictly classroom related, nor all-inclusive, they do show some insight into how student become able to discuss “the neural synapses of embryonic pigeons.” And while all of these observations are focused on ways students can distract themselves in class, there is always the omnipresent discussion of ‘paying attention.’ This can be either extremely difficult or normal routine for people. Personally, my strategy is to eliminate the distractions as much as possible, while maintaining the best posture I can in hopes of learning the most I can. Does this always happen? Well, let me just reiterate that part of this was written on a laptop in class. Do I recommend trying to distract oneself in class? Not unless the class is irrelevant or repetitive.